From Paris to New York and everything in between
Someone on Twitter wrote this to me and this same person (I think) and asks this often.
It GREATLY saddens me that SOME men in this country so often ask me why I hate men. I LOVE men. I sleep with men exclusively. I have a father whom I love. I have male friends - in fact, I hate to say this, some of my best friends are men! I work with men. I LOVE men.
WHAT I DO NOT LOVE IS SEXISM. THE OPPOSITE OF SEXISM IS FEMINISM (meaning “equality for women”) and so THAT IS NOT “HATRED OF MEN.”
A lot of times on Twitter when I tweet politically minded things such as “Abortion has been safe and legal since the 1970’s would politicians fucking KNOCK IT OFF with trying to change that….” A lot of times when I write stuff like that (forgive me for wanting control over my own body) men will write me nasty things like “shut up” and “stop being hysterical.”
Yes, I HATE those men for their small-mindedness and for HATING me first. That is not a HATRED OF MEN. That is a HATRED OF SEXIST attitudes and I’m sorry to say, women being the ones who suffer from sexism, don’t tend to write me and tell me to “seek therapy” whenever I’m feeling heated about women’s political issues.
I think I have expressed hatred for Paul Ryan and other political figures such as Senators who say that there is a thing called “legitimate rape” - THAT IS NOT MAN HATING.
I’m sorry - it must be hard for white guys to see the world ANY OTHER WAY except through their own lense and it must be very scary when it seems like an army of women are coming for them - but we’re not. So calm down and stop saying “I hate men” AND NOT FUCKING LISTENING when I write back to you to clear it up.
If you’d like to send me examples of when I have hated men - please do. Also keep in mind, you don’t know me, have never met me - so it enrages me that you’d have an opinion on WHO I AM.
p.s. Although I will say this - it’s been revealed to me that a lot of men are wimps because they seem to take it PERSONALLY when I tweet about women’s rights and how I’m offended when I am harassed. So, that’s not hatred that’s just me rolling my eyes. Ladies put up with some bullshit that would make most men cry. Just like John Boehner!
Also, not to turn this into being all about men, but to perhaps expose another weird sexist thing in our society, do men who Tweet/say/write/etc. anti-sexist things and have feminist views get anywhere near the tongue-lashing that women do? Are other men easier on feminist men than they are on feminist women? I wonder because I say a lot of stuff about women’s/LGBT/minority rights on Twitter and I never get the kind of awful response that women do. I don’t have as many followers as a professional comedian, so, duh, my audience is maybe more select and in line with my views (they are following me, after all).
Basically, just wondering if sexist men are also sexist about coming down hard on people that fight sexism.
I love the title of this post because it is something I have struggled with in the past - wanting equal rights for men and women and all segments of the population (LGBTQ/minorities) is not equal to hating the segment that seems to be dominating the discussions. I DO love men and, just like Jen Kirkman said, exclusively sleep with men, had a father I adored, have uncles I equally love, and I’d say that among my friends, 65-70% are male because I love hanging with boys.
When I write tweets about equal rights for ALL - recently, I wrote some things about rape of course, but also marriage equality in France - I DO receive attacks from people… but interestingly enough, I’d say that they are not all men. As a matter of facts, one of the first people who attacked me had a female alias (who knows who is behind any tweet, really). THEN, a couple of male twitters (how do you call people who tweet?) started adding to her arguments. In France, the same thing happened when I started a discussion around marriage equality.
I have a different attitude from Jen Kirkman’s in that I don’t JUSTIFY my views, I try to just add to the discussion by drawing parallels between these people’s lives and what they oppose. If they don’t want to buy into it and start insulting me, I stop answering and tell them that insults will lead them nowhere, and that they have a fascist mentality since they want to dominate the discussion instead of moving it forward.
Yep. This is great. Let’s talk about it.
Also, Brett is great and a true feminist.
25 October 2012